Question by Andrew T: How do I feel better about myself when I feel invisible, and most ppl have it better than me?
So, I have really high expectations for myself, and I’m not really sure what to do so that I feel better. I’m 23 years old, I live alone with my cat in a small apartment in the suburbs of the twin cities, and I’m gay. I am a personal banker, and have a few years of college behind me, but didn’t finish… I got more focused on work instead.
Here’s the problem. I never feel good about myself. I always feel like I should be working in some big skyscraper, doing something very corporate. Instead, I kinda feel like the low-life of the corporation. Sure, I wear a shirt and tie, and sometimes a suit to work, but I’m not making 40 or 50k a year, I just rent, and I don’t have a nice BMW or Audi like a lot of the other youngsters I see around here have.. I just have an Accord. I’m really at a dead end in my life and I don’t know what to do. School doesn’t seem like an option for me, because I’m working hard, and honestly I don’t know if I’d be any better off if I had a degree- Would I? I know plenty of people my own age that have degrees that have mall retail jobs. So who knows. The other thing is, I’m always told how nice I dress, how good I smell, and how attractive I am, but nobody seems to show any interest in me. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, if I’m pushing people away, or if nobody is really interested in me. I walk around sometimes with the feeling of tears welling up in my eyes I’m so lonely and sad, feeling like I’m just at this dead end and this is all its going to be… Sure I have a few friends that I go out for drinks with on the weekends, and my family loves me, but they live in Madison (4 hours away), I moved here because I like the bigger city. How am I supposed to feel good about myself when I feel like I should be doing something much … better? Making more money, living somewhere better, and driving something better. Can anyone please tell me what is typical for a 23 year old to be doing in their life, and if I’m ahead or behind? I really need some help and guidance here because I’m at a really low point in my life. I appreciate it.
Hmm. Honestly, I don’t really care about being “greener” with my vehicle. I already receive my statements paperless, ha. I’m sure a 328i or something would be fine. Better than driving a lawn mower motor Honda. And as far as what makes me happy, it IS success. Upscale areas, expensive cars, designer clothes, status. Right now that’s what I want. And I cant attain it because of money.
Best answer:
Answer by silencebwell
You sound like you are striving for success for all the wrong reasons. We ALL go through ruts in our life. The only remedy is to stay strong and pull yourself out. Do what will make you happy for you, not what you think will make you happy because you are comparable to others. Listen, when I see other young ppl driving BMW’s I think about my honda civic and how much more practical I am than those other people, one because they spent way to much money on a car at such an early age, (that is just not finacially sound), and two because I am doing the earth better for driving a ‘greener’ car. Surround yourself with the things that make you feel good and don’t be afraid of doing what you want. If you do what you really want the success will come. And people will be impressed with you. plain and simple don’t live your life through others eyes. be yourself, people will notice you.
Well that’s why you’re in the situation your in. Think it over.
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