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Question by gonzaga: » How do you get the love of your life back?
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Why did I lose my love?
Ok here it goes. I was with a girl for seven years since I was 19. We both have only been in one serious relationship and have never experienced anything with anyone else. She is my first and only everything. My first kiss, love, etc. I love her to death and know she is my soul mate. We have been thru everything together, ups and downs. We had great chemistry and so many things in common. There was the usual arguments and break ups that lasted no more then a few weeks. This girl loved me crazy and I loved her, I just did not always put her first. I let my career get in the way, and did not give her the true attention she deserved. I am a good person, and would do anything for her. We have so many common goals. I can not see myself with anyone else, ever. We were engaged 6 months ago and everything was getting rocky. We lived together and she was never at home, because of my job I was never home when I was she was not. She was not truly doing what I asked of her. There were a lot of things she would not do in order to make our relationship work and I was to blame just as much. So I called off the engagement which broke her heart I regretted doing this and it kills me. I still wanted to be with her I just needed space. I want marriage, kids, family, buy a new house with her, all of the things we always talked about. She wanted me back and I was just on the fence, a little lost. For about 2 months we tried to work things out and get back to where we needed to be. This is where everything hit me. I found out that she was talking to a new guy on facebook, she said they were just friends. Well what I found out they were more then that, she left me for him. She just recently tattooed his name on her wrist. Everyone hates the guy, she is even losing her friends because of him. She is going to move in with him. She is obsessed with him and he is obsessed with her. She does anything he says to do and I mean anything. Things she would never even think about doing for me. This guy is the total opposite of me is the definition of a true bad boy, has kids out of wedlock, drug history, not educated, the list goes on, just bad news . But he changed his life and is going to be great for her as he says. The girl I knew was a sweet heart college educated, perfect. Now she has done a 180 and turned into someone else. She is totally brainwashed by everything she is hearing. I know for a fact I have ten times more to offer her, its just that she loves the attention she is getting from him that I was not giving her. I am totally depressed. This has been going on for over a month. I have tried everything possible to get her back, nothing is working. I still love her to death and have not given up hope or faith in her because I believe in her, she is the love of my life. What do I have to do to get her back? I am totally lost right now. How long will it take for her to come to her senses? Is this just a phase she is in? Also she says I only want her now because she is someone else’s. I should have changed way sooner she says. I am not a bad person you can ask anyone in my life, I am just a little selfish in regards to pursing my career. Can someone just please give me some advice in regards to what I should do? Even after all she did I love her crazy and would take her back even in the worse case. The last time I talked to her she said if it does not work with this guy she would be give me another chance, but she wants to give him his chance right now. How long would I have to wait. What are the best steps to take to get her back, no cimmunication. I have tried everything expect cutting off all communication and giving her the true space she deserves. I just know she is falling deeper for him when I take my step back from her. Any ideas will help.

Best answer:

Answer by Renzer
Are you missing her or is it more the idea of being with her? You remember the old expression you dont know what you got till its gone. When you had her you were on a revolving door one gone while the other was there now she moved on and you are still holding on to the memory of her. You got 2 options, get yourself in a possition where you will have time for her and then try and get her back. Second choice ruin your life and screw up your career so you can be together, broke, but together.

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