Question by Lila: Why would my husband turn down the woman he had an affair with? When he’s recently been stalking her?
* I asked this last night but removed it, as a few women called the OW names, which TBH is neither here nor there to me, but does not really help my situation.
This is a complex situation.
I DO NOT BELIEVE MY HUSBAND IS A CHEATER BY NATURE, NOR OPPORTUNISTIC. He’s not a Tiger Woods type, out on the prowl, hunting women.
THAT SAID he had a 11-month affair in 2008 and 2009. He did not confess either, I found out by emails and texts between the pair. I also know he BEGGED her not to confirm it to me, and left her a “DON’T TELL MY WIFE, TELL HER WE WERE JUST JOKING” voicemail, which the woman played to me.
I stayed with him and he cut her off. I then found out that he was still trying to see her. She called me over the summer and told me. I confronted him and he said SHE was chasing HIM.
She then sent me an email which I could not deny (about him chasing her) and I turned to medication.
She also had a court injunction placed on him for harassment because I tried (and failed) to get one on her.
I recently found out he’d been waiting for her just before the December holidays, to ask why she got the law involved, and she was like “umm – your WIFE started it!”
4 weeks later he waited for her AGAIN and this time ran upto her and told her he was disillusioned with me and our marriage, and to “keep me in mind”. They talked for 30 mins.
She thought this was a green light and they met a few days later but he told her he was not leaving me, and she “must have misheard” him. He said he was not angry anymore (about the injunction) but asked her to move on without him.
She then sent him a note to say “why would you say I misheard you when you know damn well what you said to me? Call me if you change your mind. I’m leaving my job so you won’t see me around again!”
He has not responded to this as far as I know, and I think I’m right in this.
Why would he not reply to her? Is he biding his time? But if she’s moving next week, why is he not hounding her before he never sees her again?
In the past he HAS recontacted her even after telling her to move on, but has the injunction finally put him off her? He can’t have loved her that much for that to have killed his feelings?
Why would he stalk her only to tell her the next week he was not interested? (when he was the week before) I am just trying to ascertain where my marriage is headed, as I won’t leave.
Best answer:
Answer by cateyes
Didn’t I just answer this a couple of hours ago?
Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!
